This Christmas season, a time in which we exchange gift wishlists and focus on the material needs and wants of our friends and family, I would like to ask you a favor. Stop for 10 minutes, and send a thought or a prayer to the family of a very special young woman. Her name is Lizzy Seeberg, and she was murdered by Notre Dame.
Yes, it's a bold statement. It's an angry statement. I haven't been able to properly speak out about her story yet, because I am still so, so angry. But this Christmas, the gift I can give to her and her family is my voice.
If you Google her name, you can very easily read her story. She was sexually assaulted by a Notre Dame Football player, and 10 days later, she took her own life. Her case was not investigated by the NDPD until the Chicago Tribune blew the story out of the water with an investigative piece last month. Since then, there has been an outpouring of questions and support for Lizzy and her family. South Bend prosecutors are not following through on the case, however, and Notre Dame administration has not been cooperative in the least. To give you a taste of their attitudes, friend of mine who works at the Morris Inn on Notre Dame's campus and I were IMing as he watched a few of the higher up admins read the story in the lobby. He described the facial expressions and reactions. They were not just concerned - they were angry. They conducted hurried phone calls on their cell phones and though he couldn't hear what they said, he could pick up on tones and body language. It was not a pretty sight to behold.
Lizzy Seeberg is my Saint Mary's sister. One of the greatest aspects of Saint Mary's is that we are bonded for life, no matter what our major, class year, or personal backgrounds. We don't need to know each other; the bonds of sisterhood transcend time and space. We stand together. Lizzy needs us to stand up for her now, because she no longer can.
I've read a lot on the matter. I've read prosector's blogs and news articles, press releases and official statements. What the matter comes down to is not poor journalism on the part of the Chicago Tribune and the South Bend Tribune. It is not about about who has jurisdiction in what areas. It is not about fairness and good vs. bad investigative practices.
It is about the fact that Saint Mary's women are often treated as second class citizens on Notre Dame's campus, and that a high profile male has more respect and rights allotted to him than a female on their campus. It as about the fact that a supposedly Christian and Catholic group of people don't value a woman as a person, and that the Church is so drunk with its own patriarchal power that Lizzy's case was set up for failure from Day 1. There are good people at Notre Dame; one of them is my mentor and good friend. This is not an attack on the people of Notre Dame. This is an attack on the institution of Notre Dame. And there is a difference.
I lived on campus for all four of my years at Saint Mary's. I attended football games and parties at Notre Dame; I ate dinner with friends and hung out in their library on occasion when I needed a larger range of resources. I went to Ireland with some Notre Dame girls, and worked on the ND campus for two summers for Conference Services. I dated the occasional Domers; some of my friends are married to them (and they are very nice people). There is a very complex and strange relationship between Saint Mary's and Notre Dame, and I don't have the wherewithal to dive into it today. But what you should know is this: by and large, the attitude towards SMChicks from the general ND population is one of condescension and distrust. Men think we're easy, women think we're there to steal their men, and everyone knows that the reason we're at SMC is because we didn't get into ND.
With that attitude, I have no surprise that the ND "investigation" of Lizzy's allegations was swept under the rug, and met with closed mouths and "No comment" when outsiders started asking questions. When I first heard about Lizzy's death, and all of the conflicting information, my reaction was "There's something we don't know here. There's more. Way more." And I was right. There was a lot more than a stressed out and depressed young woman. There's a young man with a history of violence and disrespect who has not been held accountable for his actions. There's an administration who is desperately trying to cover things up as best they can. There's a president of a women's college who is interestingly siding with the ND administration to a certain extent, who is not willing to take a stand for her students at the risk of alienating her contacts and relationships with Notre Dame.
We can't fix the past. We cannot go back in time to help Lizzy in her hour of need. We already failed her on that count. But we can stand up and speak out about our experiences and perceptions of the culture clash that exists between Saint Mary's and Notre Dame. I don't know how to fix the attitudes. That's way beyond my personal abilities. But I can tell people what happened to me, and what I saw during my time.
Notre Dame is not a safe place for Saint Mary's women. I'm not even sure it's a safe place for women in general. I have found that institutions steeped in thousands of years of traditions generally aren't safe for those of us who live in the modern world, and embrace science and rational thought.
So this Christmas, regardless of your creed or faith, regardless of your background or your love or hate for Notre Dame, I ask you to send good thoughts, pray or do whatever you do. Ask the universe for the Seeberg family to be blessed with grace and strength. Pray for the lost girl who felt she had no recourse other than taking her own life. And hope beyond anything you've ever wished for that somehow, Justice will prevail. Because it looks like Justice needs a little help today with this case.
All I want for Christmas is Justice. I hope you want the same.
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