I can't eat that

Growing up in the Midwest during the 90s was special. Norms and commonalities of the day included corn and soy fields, mini-vans, semi-rural living, chain pizza restaurants, Roman Catholics and Lutherans, and carb heavy cooking. Figuring out along the way of my childhood who I was and what I liked, disliked and wanted was sometimes trying.

We knew from birth that I had food issues. I was breastfed for a long time, because my mother could better control what went into her body than what was in formula. A lot of my food was homemade through the toddler years and as we learned what was OK and not, my meals continued to be homemade and packed for school. Summer Girl Scout camp always was accompanied with rice or soy milk and cheese, and I knew how to read the ingredient list - and identify the problem ingredients, often with long, complicated chemical names - by the age of 8. I was a test subject for the blood allergy test, and learned that I had varied intolerance levels to SEVENTEEN foods. The biggies were wheat, corn and milk, but soy, chicken, chocolate, legumes, peanuts, cantaloupe, mushrooms, and others were not so awesome for me.

My symptoms were not overtly physical in nature: I did not break out into hives nor was I ever in danger of asphyxiation via anaphylactic shock. I had severe mood swings, headaches and migraines, terrible stomach aches, and general gastrointestinal distress (the toilet and I were BFF). My mother tells stories of how I would bang my head on the floor as a toddler because I couldn't communicate that I had a headache. At this point in my life, I am able to eat fairly normally. Wheat, milk, corn, chocolate and peanuts remain triggers of my neurological problems, i.e. migraines. Additionally, we've learned that I can't eat fake sugars because they cause migraines 100% of the time for me. Caffeine is also a powerful migraine trigger.

But being labeled a freak in elementary school because of my food issues was totally not fair. Today, it's common and acceptable to be gluten-free, have a nut allergy or choose to be Vegan. But 15 years ago in Northern Indiana, being the sole kid in a class of 20 with serious and numerous food issues was NOT fun. I was teased, pointed out, ridiculed - you name it, I dealt with it. I learned really young and the hard way that people were just stupid jerks, and that the only thing I could do was ignore them while I ate and read a book (because who wants to sit next to and talk with the weird girl who can't eat pizza and Dilly Bars?).

The entirety of my experiences and background give me a unique perspective into food and culture. I am always high aware of others' dietary restrictions. Religious, choice or medical: the reason doesn't matter. What does matter is that by paying attention to what really is not a detail, I try every day to practice kindness and thoughtfulness. We eat three times a day. Food is social, eventful, and a core part of our identities and cultures. Anyone who thinks differently is frankly an idiot.

I now have a very good friend who has a gluten intolerance. Though "intolerance" really doesn't give her issue justice, when a teaspoonful will send her to the ER. Cooking for and with her has renewed my interest in allergies and food culture. I eat with her at least 4 times a week, and sometimes the food we make or eat gets a little interesting. I don't view it as a negative in the least. Rather, it is a challenge to create tasty food with a limited list of ingredients, as if we're in our own private version of Top Chef or Iron Chef. (And I generally like being presented with a challenge, so it's a satisfying experience!)

But there is something to take away from all of this: There is so much CRAP in everything we eat. Corn syrup, wheat and soy-derivatives are everywhere, as they are cheap emulsifiers, preservatives, sweeteners and salt-ifiers. Our bodies were not made to be inundated with such processed foods, and there is something to be said for the raw diet movement (though I really, really prefer my eggs to be cooked). I don't eat pre-made snacks like fruit snacks or juice boxes, because they often have corn syrup in them. I don't drink soda, and all of my yogurt is 100% not-fat-free-low-calorie because aspartame and I are mortal enemies. Splenda and I have an equally spiteful relationship.

I do eat a lot of Asian food, and a lot of fresh homemade stuff. I tend to be heavy on the meats and veggies, light on the dairy, and I'm trying to cut back on the wheat/corn based carbs. Eating smart isn't just about calorie counting. It's realizing that our evolution as animals is tied to what we eat, which is based on what's available. You don't see a lot of obese animals in the wild, because they aren't munching on Cheetos. We are what we eat, and eating is about far more than simple calories.

That being said, I'm hungry and am going to go eat an apple. Mm, apples.